For some reason doing this blog and the reading I've been doing has inspired me to write some stuff down as a story. I'm hoping that it will help me sort through some stuff. It's loosely autobiographical. To give an example I just got done writing a scene where the main character first feels confusion about his sexuality. In reality it didn't happen for me exactly that way.
There are elements of other parts of my experience that helped to develop that scene (speaking of development I think I need to go back and flesh that scene out a little bit more, no pun intended), but I never had the exact experience I'm writing about.
There are other things I plan to do. I want to get into the time when I considered suicide. One of the things that stopped me from doing it was a cousin in another state that did do it. However in the story I'm already planning on it being a close friend that attempts it, but does not succeed.
I don't ever plan to pass it off as 100% autobiographical only to say that it's inspired by my life.
I'm hoping to cover all of my struggles with my sexuality in it including my wondering if I'm asexual or not. Who knows maybe one day I'll get it published. Or maybe I'll post it as a blog serial. Or I could always just keep it for myself. I know though that simply doing this is going to help me face some thoughts and emotions I haven't faced for years, and I think that will be a good thing.
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